~Exhaustion~

Since September I've been sick. Actually it started with my broken toe and then continued on from there. I've had multiple sinus infections, the flu, and a coldsore in my eye. Yes, you can get coldsores in your eye. The odds are crazy. It's one in 4.5 million people who get one. I'm a statistic. Apparently you get coldsores when your body gets run down. So I spoke to my health care provider.

She says the reason I've been so ill lately is because I'm suffering from exhaustion. She says my immune system can't keep up to the stress I'm putting on my body and that my adrenal glands have slowed its production of adrenaline which is why I am both tired and ill. The course is to sleep more and to cut out the stress in my life. She says I need to cut back on everything except family stuff. Hiring a housekeeper was actually mentioned.

So the first thing I did was tell the PTA I can't do the Talent Show. Wow. The guilt almost outweighed the relief. Fortunately, Cathy, the volunteer coordinator suffers from an autoimmune hepatitis. She says it's set off by stress and totally understood.

Now I'm just practicing saying no. I feel so selfish. I have heard numerous times that when you're feeling down or tired you just need to throw yourself into service and everything will resolve itself. I no longer believe that.

I'm supposed to look into some specific sleep books and learn mindful meditation. There are numerous books out there and my doctor recommended getting them from the library to see which ones are right for me. So I go to the King County Library System website to put them on hold. Each of these books have about four copies and about 32 holds. So Amazon.com here I come.

I suddenly feel like one of those celebrities who checked themselves into a hospital to rest. I can't say I totally relate but I understand.

So if anyone out there actually happens upon my blog, hopefully you'll understand if I tell you no. But since I'm still practicing please be easy on me.